My Collection

             Has it ever occurred to you how unique human beings are?  All of us are so layered, specifically when it comes to interests.  The way that I see it, most people have four main interests: you have your work interests, you platonic interests, your romantic interests, and your personal interests.  All of these can be significantly different, especially your personal interests, better known as your hobbies.  No matter how many hobbies you have, there is always one that stands out, that occupies more space in your mind than the others; an interest that could be considered an obsession.  For myself, my obsession is my collection.

             My collection means everything to me, it keeps my mind active and gives me something to eternally strive for.  What is it of, you may ask yourself?  Well, it’s a collection of merchandise and promotional material for a movie that came out when I was a kid.  It wasn’t the most popular movie made, but it means the world to me.  From the moment the title card flashed on the screen, I knew that this movie was made for me.  As soon as the movie was finished, I ran out of the theatre and immediately bought another ticket.  I was only thirteen at the time, and for the month that it was at the local theatre, I saw it forty times.  I know, it might sound excessive, but it was one of the happiest times of my life, and I shared it with my parents and my friends.  They thought it was good, but they couldn’t see the genius that I saw.

             The first pieces of my collection came during one of the saddest moments of my life, the day it was removed from theatres.  I arrived on a Friday night, ready for a great time, but my heart broke when I didn’t see the movie poster on the “Now Playing” section of the wall.  I didn’t know what to do, and in my juvenile desperation, I begged the Ticker Seller to let me see the movie, but the teenager behind the counter just laughed at me.

Defeated, I started to drag me feet out of the cinema, until I was stopped by the manager.  I had seen her many times through the years, especially in the last month.  This kind, sweet, angel of a woman saw how sad I was and offered me two gifts that to this day, are the best presents I have ever received: the movie poster and the movie’s standee.  I held them in my hands as gingerly as I could, and I couldn’t help but weep with joy.  I excitedly went home and put them in my room, and within a week, I had a frame for my poster, to keep it safe.

This was the start of my collection, and I was over the moon.  But this feeling soon faded as I realized that even thought I had these amazing possessions; I still was unable to watch this incredible film.  I had sunk into a depression, the first time in my life that I had experienced this, but not the last.  I was miserable for months, until one day I saw the VHS copy of the film in a department store I went to with my mom.  My depression lifted like the fog after a storm and I bought myself two copies; one to watch, and one to preserve.  My mom was quite happy too, for this was the first time I had smiled in months.

Now, while I realize this is an obsession, you need to know that even though my happiness became tied to this movie, I did have other interests.  I played baseball throughout my teens, I had friends, went on dates, etc.  I lived a normal life, but I just was comforted by my collection in a way that couldn’t be done with anything else.  As much as I would have liked to, I didn’t watch the film every day; I had my chores to do, homework to complete and practices to make.  A movie as amazing as this one didn’t deserve to be paused, so I only ever watched it when I knew that I would have the full, uninterrupted time to watch it.  This also helped preserve the tape, because even back then, I knew that if I watched the VHS constantly, it would wear out.  I had prepared for that though, and eventually bought myself a back up copy.

It wasn’t until I was about sixteen that I realized that not only was there not a single soul who was as dedicated to this movie as I was, but the movie wasn’t even considered a success!  How absurd is that?  When I found this out, I researched the movie on one of my school’s computers; we didn’t have one at home yet.  To my chagrin, it indeed was true.  The movie did so poorly, that the director quit the film business and became an auto mechanic.  I sank down into another depression at this, one that I didn’t think I would ever be able to surface from.  I distanced myself from friends and family.  This lasted until I went to the mall with my friends one day when a new store moved in.

It was a store that we all had never seen before; one of those that sold shirts and sundries related to pop culture and music, something we all had an interest in.  I entered the store as I continued to walk through the motions of the day; little did I know that this store would change my life.  Once we entered the store, our group disbanded to opposite nooks and corners of the establishment.  I had very little interest at this point, so I lazily perused through the shirts on the nearest rack.  As I looked for anything that piqued my interest, an unexpected shirt brought the spring back into my step.  There, on that beautiful t-shirt rack, was a black shirt emblazoned with the main character from the movie!

My jaw dropped as I gazed upon this unexpected treasure; my heart began to beat with such vigor that I feared it would burst out of my chest.  I grabbed the shirt off the hanger with one hand and resumed excitedly swiping through the shirts with my other hand, but I stopped myself; I had to.  I found this diamond in the roughest time of my life, and as much as I wanted to find all the merch I could find, I knew that this find would satiate my need for something new from my favourite film.  Plus, if this existed, why couldn’t other collectables exist?

That night I returned home from a genuinely good time with my friends, which relieved my parents.  Now that I knew what would help my mood, I needed to find a way to control this new obsession.  The first step was for me to get myself a computer.  The reason my family didn’t have one yet was that my father was a bit old fashioned and he didn’t think it was necessary, often saying that it was a fad that wouldn’t last another five years; something he had been saying for the last decade…

Once I had my own computer, I had my friends teach me about online shopping and how to find certain information online.  I’ve always been a pretty quick learner, so once he had shown me once, I didn’t need to be shown again.  This opened my world to the cornucopia of merchandise that was made from this movie.  I was in heaven, and I truly thought that my life had a purpose now.

Over the next decade I went to college, moved out of my parent’s house, got a good paying job and a home of my own.  While I had the opportunity to move in with friends, I chose to get a house of my own.  Sure, it was harder to budget and be on my own, but with having my own house, I was able to have a room solely for my collection.  I fashioned the room to be an exact replica of the main setting of the movie, down to the very last detail.  The only difference were the shelves and frames that adorned the walls containing my beloved possessions.

Through the last decade, I frequently browsed the internet in the hopes of finding memorabilia from this movie.  I looked at websites for chain stores, independent stores, and online auction sites.  I would look every day, and the finds I made doing this were absolutely incredible.  I collected every release of the movie, from DVD to Blu-ray, I bought every piece of clothing, keychains, posters, and figurines.  A couple of years ago I found a crew jacket online, along with props from the movie.  I bought every single one, which brough unimaginable joy to my life.

I mostly kept my collection mostly a secret; most people couldn’t see the genius of the movie that I saw, so why would I share it with them?  I hosted get-togethers and parties occasionally, and one time a guest mentioned the movie without me having to bring it up.  Imagine my joy when I heard this, I was over the moon.  I asked them to stay after the party was over and when the others left, I showed them the full collection.  They were amazed, and possibly a little terrified; they looked at me differently after that, but regardless they were impressed.  I was beyond excited to show them the finished curation, that is, until they said the single worst sentence, I have heard.

“Since you have everything, you must be excited to move only another hobby.”

             My heart stopped as I considered their words, and I quickly feigned a stomach-ache and asked them to leave.  I was furious at them for discrediting my collection, but I was devastated at how correct they were.  I was done, there wasn’t anything new that I had found in over six months.  Sure, there might be rereleases in a couple years, or some “vintage” clothing might come around, but I had dried the well of my obsession.

             I began to implode; life became pointless.  I felt hollow as I moved through the motions, I even took all my vacation to wallow in my defeat.  I began drinking heavily in an attempt to numb the pain.  I practically lived in my collection room, watching the movie on repeat; it was the only thing that could give me any joy anymore.  In the middle of my self-destructive vacation, I ran out of all the alcohol I had, and I needed to go get some more.  Of course, I thought this would be a good idea after I was half a bottle of whiskey in the bag.

             Safe to say that I drove into a telephone pole that night.  Luckily, there wasn’t any major damage to myself, my car, or the telephone pole, but I did need to fix the damage to my car.  The next morning, I took my car to the closest mechanic; I didn’t want to go to my usual guy and have to tell him what happened.  Unfortunately, my accident did little to brighten my mood; if I’m being honest, I wished that I would have died.  That is, until I got to the mechanic near by.

             When I arrived at the auto shop, I thought my eyes were deceiving me, because it appeared that the beloved, shunned director of the masterpiece that I love, was going to be working on my car.  As he looked at the damage, I was rooted to the spot.  It wasn’t until he asked if I were ok that I found I could move again.  When I saw his first name on his nametag, I was compelled to ask if he was indeed the genius who created my favourite film of all time.  He reluctantly confirmed his identity at first, but his expression instantly lifted once I praised his film.  This not only brought be out of my downward spiral but brought me to a new high that I didn’t know was possible.

             Suffice it to say, I prevented him from working on my vehicle at all.  I had so many questions for him, all of which he answered.  He only recently moved to the area; his last job became too overwhelming once the jerks he worked with began to make fun of him and his film.  I scoffed at that and praised it even more.  I couldn’t stand people who shamed his genius.  After picking his brain for the entire afternoon, I told him about my collection and asked him if he wanted to see it.  To my pleasure, he agreed.

             When we arrived at my home, I could barely contain myself.  I welcomed this deity into my humble abode and ushered him to my prized room.  I watched his face on pins and needles as he took everything in.  He looked amazed, with a giant smile on his face, but that soon faded.  A look of confusion formed before he tilted his head down and began to shake it back and forth.  I was lost; did I not do it justice?  Did I let him down?

             I hesitantly asked and was met with quiet laughter.  He began to mock me, saying that this collection was pathetic.  He asked me how I could even watch the movie, calling it a hot piece of garbage.  How could he insult his movie?  How dare he?

             I couldn’t help myself, I lunged at him, wrapping my hands around his throat as I brought him to the ground.  I wouldn’t let anyone talk about this amazing movie in this way!  I felt the life leave his body, but I knew the genius was still left within; I needed to preserve it.  I brought the body to my bathroom and grabbed my toolkit from the garage.  After spending hours on my task, I had finally extracted the genius inside.

             I learned two things in that moment.  First, I learned how to acquire and combine different chemicals and household objects to make a preserving solution so that I would always have his genius.  Once I put it in a jar and I filled it with the solution, I labelled it and placed it in the best location in my collection room.  The second thing I learned, is that there was a lot of genius involved in making this movie, genius that I needed to add to my collection.

             You may have noticed that I never mentioned the title of the movie in this post.  I want to assure you all that it is not a mistake.  Why would I let anyone come in the way of me completing my collection?  I have lots of work to do and I can’t let anyone get in the way.  I hope once it is done all of you will finally see the genius of this movie and will bask in the glory of my collection.

- Cody S